Why France? Why Lille?

As you already noticed, at the moment I am on my Erasmus exchange program in Lille in France. Before I start describing all places I have visited during this semester and all experiences I went though I should also share the beginning of my story.

It all began at my home university in Prague. During first weeks at my university we had a lot of presentations – about the school, possibilities of jobs, range of classes we can attend and also opportunities to study abroad. I remember exactly one moment when I was sitting there, watching the presentations about universities abroad but at that time it was only a dream for me.

When I applied to the Charles University in Prague I knew it was not an easy program. Some people even warned me not to go to the university because of difficult mathematic classes. And my supportive grandmother told me to choose easier university because according to her logical thinking is not for women. But fortunately on the other side lot of my friends and also my mother supported me to study there. Now I am really grateful to them. When I made the decision the only thing that mattered to me was that I loved mathematics. Moreover, I liked the idea of studying at prestigious university (our program is consider as the best one in the Czech Republic in Economics). That´s why the choice of Prague University was the only possibility for me. So as I said in the beginning I could not even imagine finishing my bachelor studies. However, the time passed by quickly and I managed to go through the first year with only little difficulties (such as taking the last (third) attempt for mathematic exam and studying the whole summer).

And now back to the main topic – how I got to France. In January we had to hand in applications for Erasmus program. I remember few older students said that everybody who wants, can participate in Erasmus program and it is not so difficult to be accepted. Almost everybody went to the place he or she preferred the most. It sounded so easy. But the question was - where I really want to go. After few days considering all possibilities from our list I decided either for France or either for Netherlands. I had already been to England before as an au-pair and I knew it would be the way more expensive than other European countries. So I just decided to drop whole England. Other important thing for me was practicing second language. Of course my primary interest was improving my English, but the idea of speaking fluently French seemed even more interesting to me. Actually in my head I was like: "Come on! You started learning French at high school. It is such a long time. One semester in French speaking country will help you a lot and with small effort you will be fluent during this coming semester! " At that time I did not realize how difficult it was going to be…

At my university I knew a lot of people who studied abroad so I was keen on listening to the stories about all cities! I consider also Spain (Barcelona), Portugal (Porto), Netherlands (Maastricht), the United Kingdom (Sheffield) and others. From all those experiences my friend Pavel looked the most excited about his exchange! And it matters…I believed that experience from my friends was an important point. Even if the school is great and the city is nice, problems with classes or accommodation or transportation can make the whole staying much worse. And of course people around you are the most important thing. Unfortunately, you never know who you will meet in future and you can not affect it. That´s why I just decided to follow my friend´s opinion. Finally, my first choice was Lille in France. The second one was Maastricht and the third one was Luxembourg.

The day of our application came quickly and I handed it in. Of course I also read the instructions given by our school. I remembered that the admission process depended mainly on my grades. It was convenient for me because the best students applied to Amsterdam or generally to Germany or Denmark. I was almost sure I would be chosen for my first choice. But exactly the opposite happened!

I received negative results from our school! They did not choose me! I can´t describe how horrible I felt! I was asking myself all over again. How could this have happened? I received email saying that I was only a substitute. Even worse – I was a substitute for summer semester (and I applied for winter semester). I felt so desperate. After reading the results I found out that even students with worse grades were chosen. Moreover, many students who applied to the Erasmus program for the second time were chosen… What had happened? I did not believe it. I did not know what to do so I called my friend Lucy and I could barely speak because I just wanted to cry. Nothing helped me to calm down. I have to admit that it was so difficult to reconcile with it. Everything seemed unfair to me (and I totally hate unfairness). Therefore, I argued also with the director of our school, but for nothing. They explained me that the admission process worked differently. Firstly, they ranked universities according to their criteria. Unfortunately, Lille University was not good enough according to them. It was too low. They did not have enough money to finance all universities – including mine. Therefore, they decided to prefer students who chose “better” universities (it is probably better for reputation of our university).

Actually, it really took me a lot of time to go through it. However, after few months it was better. I just needed to find another way for me to be able to study abroad or focus on different things. In the end, when my friends went abroad I had two jobs so I was busy all the time and I did not think about it anymore. After all, some kind of miracle happened! In October, I was sitting in my chair in the company where I had an internship and one girl from our school messaged me: “Barbara, I am going to cancel my Erasmus. It will be your turn. School will contact you today. ” After this message I could not concentrate on anything. I was just watching my phone whether the school would call me. And they did! They announced me that one girl cancelled her Erasmus program and thanks to her they have more money and I can study at my chosen university in France during summer semester! I did not hesitate at all. My answer was: yes, yes, yes!

When I came home I felt differently. I started going crazy. I read my academic calendar and I found out that in two months my semester started! Haha, again a lot of people told me that it was almost impossible to pass my exams in December and go abroad after (normally our exam period in Prague starts before Christmas but it lasts until the end of January). And actually it never happened before that I would finish my exams before New Year´s Eve. And my beginning in France was 4th of January! I was kind of nervous about whole situation but it was not impossible. I only needed to decide that I was able to make it. And it worked. I quit my two jobs, studied for my exams and thanks to the teachers (they allowed me to do the exams before Christmas) I was ready to go to France. I had only one day for packing my things and I did not even have time to say good-bye to all of my friends and my sister.

I had a big mess in my head because sometimes it happens that people really want to achieve something, but when the moment comes they are not sure any more if it is a right thing (in my case it was the best thing I could have done). But at that time I was not sure if I really wanted to go to France at all. On my way to France I also realized that I am moving to really small city – Lille even though I loved Prague (big city). Although I knew there was no way back. I took my bus and after 16 hours I was in Lille. I had typically the worst first day. When I got to Lille, I was not even able to carry my luggage. After that I quickly met the boy who was supposed to pick me up. We did not talk much. The good thing was that the people from International club (our new friends) took us home by car. But one minute after arrival to my new house I just felt like: “What am I doing here? ” I do not know why, but I did not like my accommodation at all. My room was very small, absolutely not interesting and everything was strange. I was sure that I had to move to another please early (in the end I stayed there whole semester). Soon I met my roommates but there was nobody from Europe! It was not bad, it was just unexpected. Anyway with my new housemates we decided to go to some bar to have first drinks with people from my new school. It was horrible, again. We were walking more than 25 minutes there because we could not find the right way. Another thing - everything was so expensive! We spent one hour there and after we were happy to go “home”. I was not in a mood to meet new people at all. In my room I had a skype call and I just wanted to cry (again haha). I mean nothing horrible happened. I just did not know what I was doing here and probably I needed to have more time to get used to new environment…

Haha, now you have to think that I am so unhappy and I hate Lille. The truth is totally opposite! This day was the only one when I was crying in Lille. After this day everything changed! The next day our orientation week started and my new amazing life with it! But more about my orientation week and stories from whole semester next time…

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