A Traditional British Christmas

Well so far as I’m aware it’s a pretty standard procedure across the country, most people I know seem to follow a pretty similar routine. So if you are lucky enough to spend a Christmas in Britain then this is perhaps a bit of what you can expect.

Firstly in the week before Christmas expect lots of news articles about the big question ‘Will we have a White Christmas?’, the answer will almost always be no, but there will always be hope. Aside from all of the snow speculation the television will also be filled with what is meant to be the best television all year, unfortunately apart from the deluge of Disney and Christmas films the majority of television, particularly after 9pm is pretty rubbish.  

There will also be an excess of everything, tonnes of food and far too much to drink. For example this year it was just my immediate family at our house for Christmas, that is four of us and the dog, so of course we bought a turkey  ‘suitable for 12-15’ as well as a joint of pork ‘suitable for 8’. In addition to these the fridge was crammed full with more food than you would need to survive the apocalypse and there were tins of Roses, Celebrations and Quality Street (the top 3 chocolate selections for Christmas) littered around the house, just in case after eating so much food you could burst you fancied some more.

Christmas decorations are of course a massive part, my favourite decoration is of course the Christmas tree itself. Every year we go to Farmer Johns, which is a local pub, to pick our tree. Of course this year I wasn’t home to do that, but luckily for me my brother didn’t want to go without me, so Skyped me whilst he was there and let me have the final choice on the tree, and was a wonderful choice, even if I do say so myself. He even waited for me to get home to put the tinsel on, bless him! Now that my brother and I are older my parents don’t do the whole hiding presents until Christmas morning thing, instead they go under the tree when wrapped, which is fun for me because I always cheekily inspect them before the day. Lights are also not just limited to public streets, houses put up their own lights too, and some really do go all out, which makes driving around a lot more fun but also a bit hazardous if you get distracted easily.

Christmas Eve is usually either spent in the pub, or at home in front of the telly getting drunk – got to be sure that you sleep through the night so that Santa comes. This year mum and I also cooked our turkey, which had spent the weekend in the garage defrosting, because we wouldn’t have enough room in the oven to cook everything on Christmas day, and nothing could be allowed to mess up the military operation that is Christmas Dinner. After a tonne of butter and seasoning and almost 4 hours of cooking under our watchful eye the turkey was done. There is just time to watch the classic ‘The Snowman’ which was this year joined by ‘The Snowman and the Snow Dog’, both beautiful films. Many people go to midnight mass on Christmas Eve, even if they don’t go for the rest of the year.

On Christmas day my brother woke me up at 7am, which is quite the lie in on our house on Christmas day. The whole family headed downstairs for presents, even the dog gets one and he is a very clever boy and opens it himself. Once presents are opened there is the obligatory tinkering with new gadgets, completely disregarding instruction manuals because of course you know better. Once everyone is dressed and the television is playing the selected Christmas films for the day you can tuck into a chocolate breakfast (chocolate is an appropriate food at any time on Christmas day) preparations for Christmas Dinner can begin. Of course Christmas Dinner isn’t eaten at dinner time, it is eaten at Sunday Lunch time, so around four. Once crackers have been pulled, bad jokes told and hats put on dinner can begin, there is more food than you could ever imagine. Classics are of course turkey, pigs in blankets (Mini Sausages wrapped in Bacon), roast potatoes, all the vegetables imaginable (including the dreaded Brussels sprouts) and cranberry sauce and gravy. Whether or not you have room left there is then dessert, which can be Christmas Cake, Christmas Pudding or even Yule Log.

After dinner is more family time, whether or not this is just the immediate family or if like we did this year you join up with other family members, where of course there will be more food, including cold turkey. Time to get out any games you may have received and play them as a family. Family time is at the core of Christmas, but don’t think that afterwards you will be able to avoid any more turkey, there will be turkey sandwiches, cold turkey and chips and turkey curry for the coming days. Make sure to enjoy Christmas with those you love, it is a really magical time, but thank goodness that all the stress and organising time is only required once a year. 

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