29 reasons why you should never visit Austria

1. "Land of mountains, land by the stream..."

Village lac

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2. ...since when is that a good sell?

Resort of Schladming

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3. Land of hills, land by a puddle is more appropriate anyway.

Austria landscape

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4. This guys looks a lot of fun.

Alpine marmot

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5. Here's one of those glorified puddles.

Austrian lake

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6. Lol this is their city hall.

City hall Vienna

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7. And this is what they call a palace?

Palacio Belvedere

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8. Already bored of these buildings.

Schoenbrunn

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9. Now here's a "ski slope" lol looks shit

Ski in Austria

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10. And again, why do they think water is so special?

River

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11. Is this meant to be some medieval castle shit?

Salzburg

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12. Don't they know it's 2015 and no one has houses like this anymore.

Hallstatt

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13. I'd rather stay in the shed at the bottom of my garden.

Chalet

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14. There's such a thing as too much snow.

Winter in Tyrol

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15. There's also such a things as NO ONE USES CASTLES.

Hohenwerfen Castle

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16. Was Austria the set for every fucking Disney princess film or something?

Neuschwanstein Castle

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17. Cineworld is better.

Opernhaus Graz

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18. I think I'd rather eat shit.

Linzer Torte

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19. Everything looks the bloody same.

Palace

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20. Genuinely, isn't this what we just saw?

Schoenbrunn Palace park

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21. Must be a reason only 4 people have decided to leave here.

Village Tyrol

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22. Think they're trying to mug off London.

Vienna

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23.Bit of D.I.Y would do nicely.

Schonbrun Palace

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24. Stop with all the age-old historic buildings.

Burg Kreuzenstein

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25. Overrated.

Mozart

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26. People have iTunes now, you don't need to go out and listen to stuff.

National Opera

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27. Scruffy bunch.

Vienna Opera Bal

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28. Must be the queue to get out of the country...

Ischgl, après-ski party

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29. ...because as we can see, it's pretty god damn awful.

Green lake

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Because in fact, Austria is gorgeous! And if you haven't visited it yet, this is definitely a good time to do it!

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