30 reasons why you should never go to London
Published by 
Jake Entwistle
— 8 years ago
Blog: Musings of a moany English guy during 'the best year of his life'Tags: Erasmus blog London,
London,
United Kingdom
1. Why everone apparently loves London and its landmarks, I'll never know.
2. Big Ben? Big Bollocks Bell Tower more like.
3. "But it lights up at night! "
4. So does my £4 plastic Christmas tree, but you don't see me banging on about it.
5. Palace of Westminster next to it is all hype too.
6. I built LEGO castles better than this shit when I was 4.
7. £25 just to look at this? Daylight (well, nightime) robbery if you ask me.
8. As for this... just a shit ferris wheel that takes a year to get round.
9. Why the fuck would you get married in it?
10. All their famous 'pubs' stink of piss and cigarettes.
11. Don't even get me started on the food.
Steak Blue Cheese Burger - Hache Burger, Shoreditch
12. Just the same old thing...
13.... and it's all a load of shit.
14. London is just a concrete jungle...
15.... where it always rains.
16. When it doesn't, it will probably fucking snow...
Arsenal's Emirates Stadium, North London
17.... even then it still looks ugly as fuck!
18. It's got no character.
19. No individuality.
20. No fans.
21. Sweet fuck all. Boring.
22. Only nerds go to musuems...
23.... and posh twats to the Proms.
24. The Thames has probably got more shit than actual water in it.
25. Oooooooooooh, trains and buses... shame I'm not six years old.
26. Looks safe.
Westminster Underground Tube Station
27. I wish it was the way out... OF THE COUNTRY! Rekt.
28. London, the city of giant sex toys named after pickled vegetables.
29. Buildildings if you will.
30. Absolute disgrace of a city.
View of London from Waterloo Bridge
Photo gallery
Content available in other languages
- Polski: 30 powodów, dla których nigdy nie powinieneś odwiedzić Londynu
- Nederlands: 30 redenen waarom je nooit naar Londen moet gaan
- Français: 30 bonnes raisons de ne pas aller à Londres.
- Português: 30 razões pelas quais você não deve nunca vão a Londres
- Italiano: 30 ragioni perchè non dovresti mai visitare Londra
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